In his article, "Different Motivational Strokes for Differentially Motivated Folks," Dr. John Tauer explains a time he was challenged when attempting to motivate a basketball player he coached. Dr. Tauer thought that he had motivation broken down to an exact science. In this case, he had been proven wrong. Tauer initially stressed the value of intrinsic motivation for a person to succeed over extrinsic motivation. His player surprised him by saying it was necessary that his coach yell, punish, and embarrass him in front of the other players in order to motivate him. Puzzled by his athlete's acceptance of his own lazy behavior, Dr. Tauer listened to what the player had to say and continued to motivate him in this manner and eventually culminated in a successful season overall.
I personally know that I am not motivated to do something if I am being spoken to in a negative tone. Although it is necessary to get a 'kick in the butt,' there are often poor communicators who attempt to motivate others but actually end up demotivating them. I think in motivating people, in any type of setting, it is necessary to first establish a layer of trust and to next treat them as a equal- not to condescend or belittle them. I think understanding that everyone responds to different things is necessary when motivating a group or an individual.
What motivates you? Do you respond better to some people and not others? Why or why not? Have you ever been faced with a difficult situation in trying to motivate others? What happened?
I agree that there needs to be an initial layer of understanding and trust before people can use negative tones to motivate others. If there's no respect initially, then the person on the receiving end of the line can take the words said to heart, instead of taking them and trying to turn them around. But everyone's responses are a little different. I respond to people I can trust are trying to help me do better. I have been faced with a situation in which I've had to motivate others. It was difficult because it seemed like all the kids wanted to do was goof around, and it seemed like there were many of them and only one of me. I didn't want to have to yell at them if I could help it, but in the end speaking a little more sternly than I had been before ended up being what they needed to focus. Contrary to the psychologist's case in the article, these kids were not aware of their "laziness", just as the basketball player was. In the end, it all worked out. I don't think that completely yelling at the children would have worked in my case, because they were just children and we didn't know each other well enough to have that basic understanding.
ReplyDeleteWhen people tell me I can’t do anything I know that motivates me to prove them wrong, but sometimes it back fires because I start thinking “yeah they’re right I can’t do this” and it works against me. I know that I react better to people who I know I can trust or at least are looking out for me because I know they actually believe in me and want me to achieve my goals.
ReplyDeleteBeing the captain of the bowling team or any team sport or activity, you have to be able to motive the people you are with. I found that it can be difficult because you have so many people that react differently to different words and tones. For example one girl can react really well to knowing that another team is beating us but I can say the same thing to another girl and that makes them feel like they can’t do anything and are bring down the team.
I'm motivated by the though of success. I do everything I can in order to succeed. Although when I was younger, my parents would motivate me to work harder by yelling at me if I got a bad grade, now I push myself to succeed and ignore outside influences. Yes, my dad may tell me I did poorly on my report card and need to raise my average a few points, but that's not what makes me study harder. It's the hope that come May I will exempt from my finals.
ReplyDeleteI don't have trouble motivating other people around me. If I want to set my mind to something I usually have a positive attitude and am happy whenever talking to someone. My good mood generally rubs off on other people, and they are more than happy to help since I'm sincere and respectful.
I play volleyball and motivation is a big part of the game. To motivate me, the person should not yell. Yelling causes me to shut down and to not want to perform the task. If I mess up, tell me how to fix it rather then yelling, saying I know better. If I knew better than I would not have made the mistake. Also a positive tone in the coaches voice and praising me when I do the right task, also helps. I definitely respond to certain people. If it is a coach that I respect in that matter of their judgement, then I will respond to what they are saying. If the person making the comment is a parent or a spectator, I will not respond in the way they would like. Since the coach knows what they are talking about and the parent is a wild fan, would be my judgement. In my club volleyball team, I was captain. As captain you need to motivate your teammates to want to win. The job wasnt always easy, especially when the team we were playing was not very skilled. We needed to learn how to have fun even when the game was slow.
ReplyDeleteI feel like I'm that weird person who responds to both negative as well as positive motivation. With negative motivation I wish to prove this person wrong and rise up beyond the expectations they have set for me. I also respond to positive motivation to continue receiving it. I also haven't realized a difference in who I respond better to.
ReplyDeleteI feel like it is hard t motivate others in their times of frustration because I know that when I feel like this I wish for solitude. Though I try and motivate them, I respect their wishes if they would like my company or not.
I personally am not motivated by yelling or harsh comments. Instead, I am more motivated by the thought that someone might be disappointed in me, not angry with me. If I think that there is a chance that my mother or my father might be disappointed in something I did or didn't do, I'd be more motivated. If I know that someone would be disappointed in me, I feel guilty and am therefore more likely to do what is right/be motivated.
ReplyDeleteI usually respond better to people I know more or care more about. I'm not going to be as worried about disappointing a stranger than I will be about disappointing my parents or best friends.
I haven't really had an experience with trying to motivate people, but if I ever am, I will be sure to try to gain their trust and establish a good working relationship to get them motivated.
I think that intrinsic motivation is more important than extrinsic motivation. No matter how many people motivate you to do something with all of your effort, if you have no passion for what you are doing, it will not produce the result that your motivator would like to see. I am motivated by my coaches to do well in sports, but more so, I am motivated by myself because I want to be able to contribute to my team's success and compete to my highest capacity.I respond better to a coach who is on the calmer side. I like a coach that speaks up and instructs me, but being that i am a sensitive person, I get preoccupied when a coach yells at me and it makes it hard for me to focus on the game. I try to motivate my team and it becomes difficult because different people need different types of motivation. My one teammate might need to be yelled at in the face to get motivated while another might need a pat on the back and reassurance. In this, it becomes difficult to cater to everyone's needs at the same time.
ReplyDeleteI have seen first hand that some people are theur own worst enemy when it comes the time they try to motivate themselves. Because as people are trying to motivate them to do well they keep thinking about the pressure they have to face and the times they did not do well. I know that for me I respond differently to certain people. My one coach I respond positively to when he yells at me but the other I do not want to hear him when he yells I want to lash out. I believe though that everyone needs to be yelled at at some times you cannot always get a pat on the back especially when you do not deserve it. I have been faced with a difficult time trying to motivate others. This person could not accept the fact that they could do it and are clearly capable of it because they kept thinking about how bad they have recently done. You can only do so much to try and motivate someone but if they do not truly believe it in their heart and mind then there is nothing more you can do.
ReplyDeleteI often have problems with motivation. I do best with self-motivation but that is only in things I like. But my mom tries to motivate me and it comes so often that it has become an annoying thing that I ignore. This often affects my motivation negatively, making me want to do something less. This happened when I was submitting my college applications. My mom kept telling me that i had to work on them; yelling at me, emailing me, texting me and calling me. So eventually I lost my self-motivation and stopped working on them. It took until the deadline started to come and the extrinsic motivation of getting in trouble from guidance kicked in. I find that outside motivation from people I am not comfortable with or people I want to impress affects me the most. Thing like in AP Calc I want to impress Mr. Millard so I do the homework really affect me. His approval when I get a hard question right makes me want to get more right. I find that approval from people gives me better motivation than fear or the possibility of disapproval.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Gaby, I respond to both Negative and Positive motivation. My dad will yell and tell me I can't do something to motivate me into actually working harder and doing it, while my mom is more relaxed and tells me often that I should be striving for the best I can be, motivating me more subtly and calmly.
ReplyDeleteI'll respond to someone I know more than I would to a total stranger, but when I did my six hours to get my permit, I was driving with a total stranger and I was motivated to be the best driver he could have possibly ever taught. I have a lot of self motivation before I pay attention to others' motivation. Like I'm a little OCD where before I actually start my homework, I need to make a list of what needs to get done and have a space for a check mark when it is done, this is something I do so self-motivate myself.
I tutor kids and part of the motivation I use depends on the child. I won't ever yell, but sometimes I can tell they are feeling belittled when they don't understand something so I put them and myself on the same level by saying "Let's be honest" and i'll tell them I struggled with what they were learning too and that if they focus really hard for ten minutes they will either be done with the short assignment or we can take a break. I've learned through the kids I teach that most people just want to have some sort of approval--like what Randi said. When I teach CCD to first graders, after we have our coloring worksheet, almost every kid comes up to me when they finish to tell me they finished and hear me say "great job" or "nice coloring" or "mom and dad will like that" I'm not threatening to tell call in a parent if the kid doesn't color their paper.
What truly motivates me is something inside me that pushes me to do something. I usually cannot get swayed by other people and neither do I listen well to whatever other people want. Rather, I like to listen to what I want to do. Even because of this, I have a problem with self motivation. Often I wish I could just let life flow and do things a whim instead of when things actually has to be done. I do listen to some people better than others. There are people who I trust more so when they tell me something to do, I tend to take their advice, etc. I don't respond well to anger or when I get in trouble so when it comes to strict teachers, I can't really get anything done. Rather, a teacher who gets disappointed rather than angry has a better effect on me. I definitely think that it is hard to motivate people. As a peer mentor, I find that sometimes it takes so much energy to try to motivate some freshman to attend school activities. People like to listen to themselves and not what other people say. In this situation, I had to come up with as many examples to excite the person, say something funny about it, and give a personal experience.
ReplyDeleteI find this really interesting because on the outside looking in I would completely agree with the fact that intrinsic motivation supersedes extrinsic motivation, but when I look at my own life and experience, I can see where this might vary. I know that with things that I KNOW I HAVE to do or things that I simply want to do, my intrinsic motivation is enough to get me to accomplish whatever it is that I need to do. But with other things that I seem to put off or things that I know that I can do halfway, extrinsic motivation like yelling and ultimatums help. I feel as though I am a pretty responsible person, but depending on what it is, treating me like a child is sometimes the push that I need.
ReplyDeleteThe way I'm able to be motivated is through a combination of both intrinsic and extrinsic methods. Even though I would know that I need to get something done, I'd need a push or a reminder from an outside source in order to motivate me to complete whatever the goal is, unless it's something I genuinely enjoy doing. I agree with Regan in the fact that when it comes to motivating others, an initial respect for each other must be present. If one takes another not seriously enough or if one is overly condescending or belittling, chances are it would decrease rather than increase the level of motivation one is feeling. I'm always put in the motivator position after school when I have to help my 11-year-old brother complete his homework. I find that he usually responds best when I sit and talk it through with him, instead of just nagging or yelling at him to finish his assignments
ReplyDeleteI am motivated most when I am trying to please someone else. For example if i have a project due for a teacher i like and respect i will be more motivated to work hard on the project. I also do not respond to anyone who talks condescendingly towards me. In fact i would feel the need to do the opposite as they said just to spite them. If i am given respect as am treated as an equal i will be more likely to respond in the same way. One time, a couple summers ago, i had to motivate my friend leave the house after her boyfriend broke up with her. It had been a few weeks and she still wasn't ready to leave the house. I was more aggressive with her and almost forced her to come out with me, but i think that was just what she needed. She ended up coming out with me and having a great time, i think if someone had gone over and been a pushover she would not have left the house, the 'kick in the butt' was just what she needed.
ReplyDeleteI respond better to positive motivation rather than negative motivation. If someone encourages me, I will work harder to succeed, if someone is screaming at me and telling me everything that I am doing wrong, I would feel discouraged. Although sometimes if someone says "you can't do that," I feel even more motivated to prove them wrong. I respond better to people I am close with and not with people who I am just acquainted with. If my mom pushed me I would feel more motivated than if my neighbor came over and told me the same thing my mom did. This is because I have more of a connection to my mother than my neighbor, obviously. I have tried to motivate people, but I think I do it in a negative way without even realizing it. I try to point out the good things but I also point out the bad things. Eventually everything worked out whether it was because of me or someone else motivating her.
ReplyDeleteI definitely think that I respond better to intrinsic motivation that to extrinsic. The first thing that comes to my mind is when my mom tells me to clean my room or go to bed, and her condescending and all-knowing tone making me want to do anything but whatever she has told me, even if I am exhausted or really can't stand the state of my room. My mom's attempts to motivate me often actually demotivate me, and therefore my intrinsic motivation is solely responsible. I know that in the end I will only clean my room if I feel an urge to and that I will only go to bed if I am exhausted and decide that going to bed early would be a good idea. However, extrinsic motivation will sometimes be enough to get me to do something, depending on what it is, who is asking me to do it, and how much I will get out of it.
ReplyDeleteI definitely am motivated extrinsically, I like to please other people such as getting into a good school to make my parents proud. However, I do not find it motivating when people use insults or yell or just speak in a condescending manner. To me, it doesn't really encourage me to try it just makes me annoyed and unwilling to please the person. I have never really been n a situation where I am forced to motivate others however I think it would be difficult to motivate people, because everyone responds to different motivation techniques in a different way. I know not everyone is motivated the same way as I am so I think it would be tough to figure out what most people would respond to.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Dylan, I really motivated extrinsically because i like to please others by helping them with anything they need to do. This type of motivation also comes into play when I try to do well not only in school but also in life in order to make my parents proud of me. I respond better to people who support me rather than disagree with me. I love to prove people wrong by going against their word. When people tell me that I am wrong I love to prove them wrong acts as a motivation for me. I have been faced with the difficult situation in trying to motive my friends to do well in school. I always try to motivate and give my word of advice in order to help them. For example, I always try to in a way tutor my friend, Anthony, in order for him to do good and school and go to a good college next fall. Luckily, he agrees with me and allows for me to help him with things such as common apps, essays, etc.
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