So I ask you - Do you consider your "Facebook Friends" to be your real friends? How do you think Facebook is changing the way we interact and build relationships? Do you think that there is a negative side and an ultimate downfall? and How if possible do we go about "fixing" this problem to ensure that our future generations still maintain some sense of real communication while embracing new things like Facebook?
Tuesday, January 24, 2012
Facebook Friends?!
Let's face it, most of us LIVE on Facebook. In the span of a week we rack up more hours mindlessly wandering through Facebook than doing our homework and as pathetic as it sounds, it is how we keep our social lives functioning, but is it a bad thing? With over 400 million Facebook users, people are concerned that we are making a dangerous transition into a world where our current generation and future generation will not know how to interact face to face, a world in which we cannot navigate through communication and ultimately world in which people will not really have "real friends". In "Friending and Unfriending: A New Social Order?" written by Larry Rosen, Rosen brings up the question about whether or not our Facebook friends can be considered real friends and what that means for society.
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I can say I do not consider most of my Facebook friends to be my real friends. My group of real friends does not consist of 500 people. However, Facebook has allowed me to become friends over time with people I know I'm going to meet in the future. I've met other kids I knew were going to the same summer camp that I was, which was beneficial when it came time to go to the camp, because I felt more comfortable knowing there would be familiar faces there. The same thing is happening now with the college I'll be attending in the fall. Facebook allows my future classmates and I to interact with one another, seek out a potential roommate(s), and let each other know when we'll all be at different orientation days. Facebook is definitely changing the way we interact and build relationships, because it allows us to get a head start on those relationships. However, it is also disabling us because it is slowly taking the place of face-to-face conversation. It can build up self-confidence in a person as well, knowing they can hide behind a computer screen and say whatever they'd like, which can lead to bullying and is a definite downside. An extension of bullying is creating a fake profile and impersonating someone or bullying someone through that fake persona. I don't know that we can "fix" this problem, but only embrace it, while simultaneously using it with discretion.
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ReplyDeleteI personally do not consider my “facebook friends” as my friends, they are just people I know because of school or some other activity, but I would never go hang out with them on the weekend unlike my real friends or tell them about my private business.
ReplyDeleteFacebook and the internet in general are changing relationships and like everything else there is a good side and a bad side. The internet makes it easier for people to stay in touch and update people about their life. However, that’s not a relationship or communication. Communicating has three parts to it listening, body language, and what the other person is actually saying it is not simply typed words on a screen, which makes it easy for people to lie and fake emotions. It can be a downfall because people will not learn how to communicate with another human being therefore making it hard for college and job interviews in the future. To be honest I don’t know how to fix this problem without people being regulated by something or someone else.
I also agree with Regan it makes it easier to start conversation with people who you will meet in the near future, like college.
ReplyDeleteI would not consider everyone I am friends with on facebook my real friends. Facebook does allow you to connect with people you used to be friends with or can even help you become friends with someone you know from school, so it can help build relationships. The problems that could come with this are when people do consider all their facebook friends their real friends and think they don't need to interact with actual people. If everyone thought that way nobody would actually have real friends or the ability to interact face to face with people. I agree with Regan in that we really cannot fix the problem because we cannot change how people think of their facebook friends. All we can do is make sure we know that only going online is not an actual friendship and make sure we still can talk face to face to somebody.
ReplyDeletePersonally, I wouldn't consider my Facebook friends real friends, as a majority of them are just people I've known because of a specific activity or trip, and are really just acquaintances. As Regan said, I think that Facebook is changing the way we build relationships by allowing us to meet new people. A group was formed on Facebook to meet others who were accepted Early Decision to the same school that I applied to, and as a result I am able to interact with other incoming college freshmen. While the ability to talk with people before an event or trip can be beneficial in making a transition easier, there can be a downfall to the concept of Facebook friends. Communication between those online versus those face to face can be different, as you'll never really know who you're talking to or what their personality really consists of. I think a balance between Facebook and actual face to face interaction is necessary to form real relationships. Facebook is a great site that allows you to keep up with people you might have otherwise lost contact with as well as allowing you to meet new people that have similar interests as you do. However, it's not a substitute for actual interaction.
ReplyDeleteI am personally, very careful about who I add on facebook, so my "friends" is actually a smaller number than most people, and even having 200 less friends than the rest of the world, doesn't mean any of these people really deserve the title of "friend". My close friends are my lunch table, the kids I sit with in the halls, and those I spend my weekend with, not the people that inform me about their everyday activities via the internet.
ReplyDeleteI don't have a smart phone, so personally I don't use facebook as often as alot of my friends, I can go a week without checking it and it isn't the end of the world.
Facebook has positives as well as negatives. It does provide a window for getting to know people in a slower manner, we can slowly get to know an acquaintance or future friend.
Facebook and the internet are changing relationships, and to some extent it will probably be a negative effect for future generations. Our generation is preoccupied with the internet but most of us know how to hold a face to face relationship. Regan pointed out embracing the effects and being cautious of the possible downfall. It will probably be a parental decision on how much kids use the internet and how often they leave the house and interact with people.
Though I know everyone I am Facebook friends with, they are not all my real friends. Like Regan said, Facebook does has its advantages. It allows me to keep in touch with people I wouldn't be able to see regularly or as often as I'd like. There are cons to Facebook, however. I feel that it does limit that amount of face to face contact we have with others, which could affect how we interact in the future. If we rely more on interacting online as opposed to in person, we could diminish our communication skills. As people, we need real personal interaction.
ReplyDeleteI definitely do not consider all of my facebook friends my real friends. I think sometimes it is common to accept someone you don't really know to rack up more friends. I know that I have a system in which i accept whoever requests me as long as we have more than 50 mutual friends. By no means does this ensure that i'm actually friends with these people. I haven't really experienced a problem with Facebook where is stunts face to face communication. However, i can't really compare communication now with communication that took place before facebook because I was on facebook or myspace at a very young age. I think that although i'm not experiencing problems now, as i grow older and accept more and more friends, i might have trouble communicating in person if all i do is talk to people on facebook. I don't really think there is anything that can be done about facebook from any kind of authority like the government. I think that it is up to each of us to not get sucked into facebook and to maintain face to face relationships and communication.
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ReplyDeleteI don't consider my facebook friends my real friends, but the alternative my real friends are some of my facebook friends. I believe that facebook is changing our society to the extent that it is our society, in order to get connected with others facebook is a must. Social networking sites are becoming the way we get jobs, make friends, and see the world around us. It is also diminishing the use of social skills in the world and I think that soon we will be living in a "virtual world." In order to fix this problem, our generation must learn to balance using facebook to interact with friends, but also socializing and meeting new people away from their computer. To save society someone just has to tell themselves enough is enough and simply just step away from the monitor.
ReplyDeleteWhen I was a freshman and sophomore I had over a thousand "friends" many of which I had no idea who they were. I then realized that I did not want all of these people seeing my personal information so I began to delete the people I did not know at all and even the ones I knew of but never actually met. I have very few real friends so to say that my friends on Facebook are real would be ridiculous. I think that Facebook is hurting the way we learn to make friends and build relationships because no one picks up a phone anymore or communicates face to face; it is all done via internet. I think that this could have a negative impact because the situation is not going to to get any better as the years go on because technology is going to keep increasing. I think that more people are going to become introverted because they are going to be so used to only communicating with people online. I think to fix this problem it is all up to the individual person. People need to know that they cannot live their whole lives on Facebook or other networking sites.
ReplyDeleteI have over 1000 friends on Facebook. Now do I know them all? No I do not. But the ones that I do know or have talked to some point, doesnt mean I have had to have met them face to face, I do consider them my friends. Along with the way in which today society makes friends, I think the definition of friend is also changing. Who I considered my best friend was a guy who I never really got to hang out with much but we would video chat every night. He goes to bosco and is my age. We would video chat every night and see each other maybe once every two months. Just because we didnt see each other didnt mean that we couldnt share personal aspects of our life with each other. I definitly think that Facebook and all the social media websites are changing the way in which we make friends. Expecially for college, the Facebook group is blowing up with people talking about themselves and trying to branch out and make friends before college starts. I think that, like everything, Facebook has a good and a bad side. I think a major thing to consider is that if you are going to have your internet buddies and your friends that you actually socialize with, be careful what you tell them. You might seem super safe with someone but that could be because you're typing and not looking them in the eye. Nothing super personal should ever be shared over the internet. What you write is there forever. If you do not have enough guts to tell that person to their face then you do not have a strong friendship with them.
ReplyDeleteThe people I'm friends with on facebook are generally people I go to school with and people I've talked to before, in reality. Though we are "facebook friends" I wouldn't consider myself to be friends in reality with them, however I would consider myself to be acquaintances with them since I have an actual relationship with them off of facebook. I think that facebook has drastically changed how we have relationships with other people. One thing people care about in person is how they look and come across. Now the exact problem is online: how does my profile look, what will this communicate to other people. I think this has created a negative aspect to relationships. Not only are more people self conscious but they are also lacking social skills in communicating face to face. In order to fix this problem, I think that video chatting(which should only be done with people you know) could help in stimulating face to face communication online. Another way to salvage social skills is by limiting time spent on the internet and communicating with people on the phone and in person.
ReplyDeleteI don't really consider half of my Facebook friends my real friends. Many times people who I am friends with on Facebook are people that I know and have met a couple times but I wouldn't consider them being my friends. The other half are my family (I have a big Indian family!) and my friends from school and different activities that I am a part of. I think Facebook is really changing relationships today. Your looked upon as popular when you have over 1000 friends. Being someone who is social used to be about someone who had a huge social life, not someone who has a lot of Facebook friends. I do think that Facebook has a negative side. People are now loosing the skills to communicate with people face to face. Rather than calling up a friend, we just "Facebook" them or message them. Communication is totally different now and when it comes time for teens to communicate in the real world, it will probably be difficult for those who spend most of their time communicating with people through Facebook. To fix this problem, I think people should advertise the negative effects of spending too much time communicating on Facebook. Just like with smoking, where there are tons of commercials and ads going against it, people should speak out against Facebook and educate people on it's negative side effects.
ReplyDeleteI do not consider all of my Facebook friends my real friends, only those I know outside the parameters of Facebook I would consider my 'real friends. If they need to be described as my "Facebook" friends which is online, then they cannot possibly be described as real when I have never seen them outside of my computer screen.
ReplyDeleteFacebook, and other social networking sites alike, has revolutionized the way in which we form friendships and maintain them. When friendships are formed through Facebook there is already a layer of distrust that is created through the computer screen that separates us from the other person. It is impossible to be able to form a real friendship with another person through a site like Facebook due to its very nature of existing online. If a friendship only exists in an online virtual space, does it really exist?
There are benefits that Facebook offers such as maintaining open lines of communication with people in our lives that we've established relationships with outside of the Internet. Facebook is a great tool that can positively be used in reconnecting with people we've fallen out of touch with and sharing part of who we are with others we feel comfortable with.
On the contrary Facebook, along with other social sites online, is proven to be linked with the rapid decline of social skills of people in our generation and even the generation prior to ours. Due to the very nature of Facebook, it prevents people from seeing the person they are talking to which eliminates factors of communication such as tone of voice, body language, facial expression, and other social setting variables. Because these key contributors of effectively communicating are absent when Facebook friendships are formed, they are very likely to be absent when the friendship is experienced outside the computer screen. It is difficult to form a true friendship because the two people involved have already reached a point where they've exchanged ideas, thoughts, opinions, and personal information about each other through the internet so when the time comes they feel as if their online self is at one point with the other person and their actual self is in essence a stranger to the other. I believe that this would leave both feeling uncomfortable and prefer expressing themselves through the internet on Facebook. This would make a person feel safer interacting with others online as opposed to in person so that they are able to project part of themselves they wish for others to see as well as eliminating the fear of rejection or judgement one might experience outside Facebook.
With the Internet existing as a crucial part of our lives, I do not see how the observed effects of online communication are able to be reversed or hindered. Things will continue as they are and I think it is up to the individual to determine their choice in how they form friendships and how they choose to identify themselves in a society that exists outside the computer or internet in general.
I agree with pretty much everyone else in that I would not consider all of my Facebook friends my "real" friends. However, I do not accept friend requests from people that I do not know at all or do not have a ton of mutual friends with. I think that although Facebook can be harmful when abused, it also allows us to communicate with the people we do know more frequently and in ways that we might not always be able to face-to-face. I think that the negative side of Facebook is that like they said in the presentation about cyber bullying, people tend to separate their internet identities from their real identities, and end up saying and doing things they wouldn't do in real life. I think that the quick, easy, and consequence-free environment of Facebook promotes impulsiveness, and people may end up posting things they would not advertise in real life because of how easy it is to post before you think. I think that discretion should be left up to each individual using Facebook, and that the only thing the rest of us can do is try to make it clear that what happens on the internet does have consequences and that once it is put out there it cannot be taken back, so that people can start to take the time to think before they post something.
ReplyDeleteI also have way more friends on facebook than the people I talk to on a regular basis. Of course, I have the normal school friends, friends from past experiences, that random guy you spent a whole weekend with once but don't talk to anymore and my family all as facebook friends, but most of them I don't count as my friends. This isn't even on the basis of "you should be able to count your friends on one hand". A lot of the people I am friends with on facebook, I do not consider to be my friend. I am friends with some people I don't know and some people I haven't talked to in years. I think facebook has distorted the view of friendship. I always found it odd that we have "facebook friends" and you can request to "friend" someone. It takes away normal social interaction. I don't walk up to someone on the sidewalk and request a friendship from them. Facebook, and all social media, also affect our people skills. People text and facebook chat, but are forgetting how to talk face to face. One positive of facebook is the video chatting feature. This is bringing back face to face conversation and re-personalizing social media interaction.
ReplyDeletePersonally I do not consider my "Facebook friends" to be my real friends, because my real friends are people that I constantly hangout. I know that on Facebook I have a lot of friends that I don't consider real friends because I haven't seen them in a while or don't hang out with them as much. For an example, I am friends with all my classmates that I went to middle school with even though they attend a different High School. I think that Facebook is changing the way we interact and build relationships because it is the main source to finding new friends. Today, I have constantly been hearing about how couples have been meeting on Facebook then pursuing each other. This makes me feel that our life relies on the internet and everything that goes on within it -like Facebook. Facebook may affect how we socially interact with people when face to face because we are no longer hidden behind a computer screen. I think that this may be the negative side of having your entire life evolve around Facebook. In order to fix this I feel that we need to step away from Facebook and meet new friends face to face and have a actual conversation with them.
ReplyDeleteI do not consider my "Facebook Friends" to be my real friends. Sure I have my actual friends on there, and people I went to middle school with or have met over the years, but I don't consider the majority of them "friends" I think Facebook is changing the way we interact and build relationships because people can say/do things over the internet that they would never/say do in person. Some people can appear and act totally different on Facebook than they are in person. I think that would be the negative side of being on Facebook, people do not know how to act in person. To fix this I think that people should actually build relationships in person and not via social media websites like Facebook. If they feel the need to use a website, maybe video chatting face-to-face would help with actual social interaction.
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